"Mobley couldnt hit his own butt if he tried using both hands!"
-Bill
Walton on Cuttino Mobley's horrible shooting game against the Pacers.
"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
- Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks
"Old men dont use Viagra because they are impotent, its because
old women are usually very ugly."
-Comedian Guest Star on Conan O'Brien
Faraz: Hmm...There's gonna be an Ariosis Pharell concert.
Chris: What!? Gimme that (grabs schedule)...that's Farewell Concert!
Ahmed: What a dumb$hit!
"Its so beautiful..like...a fat woman who suddenly loses a lot of weight"
-Fernando from Vice City
"God gave men a brain and a penis, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both
at the same time."
-Robin Williams
"A
company is making an action figure of George W. Bush. Supposedly by moving around George Bush and making him talk, kids will
know what its like to be Dick Cheney."
-Conan
O'Brien
purrr zn cat: i've been having an affair with the gardener this whole time anyways
purrr zn cat: /antonio/ . . . manuelos uncle!
MoezTavern:
i know!
MoezTavern: i sent him over
purrr zn
cat: =-O
MoezTavern: and i have the tapes!
purrr zn cat: oh no you didnt!
purrr zn cat:
*slap*
MoezTavern: now ill post them on Kazaa!
MoezTavern: titled "man has sex with elephant!"
RaPt0r2157: i'm gonna make it so i can message while i'm away
RaPt0r2157:
then i can be annoying
MoezTavern: uh
MoezTavern:
why do you wanna be annoying?
MoezTavern: ive tried it Andrew
MoezTavern: it doesnt help get you chicks
RaPt0r2157:
i know
RaPt0r2157: lol
RaPt0r2157:
did i say i was doing it for that
MoezTavern: oh i see
MoezTavern:
so you think itll help get you men?
RaPt0r2157: rofl
"ABC
News says I should watch them because of their great coverage. But I'd really rather see some nudity."
-Keith
(from his subprofile)
Tim:
Al, why don't you tell us your favorite thing about gardening.
Al:
Well I think it would just be getting down and dirty with my hoe.
(Quote
Accuracy: 80%)
stonedloserMax: and you're like a tania-lovin
gangsta-ed up wannabe thug strong guy but doesn't really use his strength.
"As if Red Sox haven't suffered enough, now they must endure the Byung-Hyun
Kim era. 'Here I come to blow the gaaaammmmeeee.'"
-Sportscenter
"I think gay marriage should only be between a man and
a woman."
- The next California Governor
Quillan showing that he is still a fob at heart. I asked him if he knew what the word was for "extreme nationalism."
p 0rk i pYne: do u know like how the word is like
Fry: I know that monkey, his name is Donkey.
Professor: Monkeys cant be donkeys! Stop messing with my head!
